Hannah
Graham, Washington
"When I came to Teen Challenge, I was filled with a lot of guilt. I felt like life had been torn away from me and I deserved to be dead. I blamed God, my family, and my friends. But in all honesty, I was the one to blame. I had caused my own problems and I had caused my own downfall.
The start of my 'spiral down' began shortly after graduating from high school. I made the choice to stop living my life for God and instead live it for myself and for the world. So that summer, I moved out of my parent's house and got an apartment. With my newfound independence, I moved into a very immoral lifestyle. I began hanging out with college friends who I knew lived very wild lives. I started going to their parties, drinking their beers, and getting high off anything they offered me. At first, the drinking and getting high were a way for me to be social. However, the more I kept going to their parties, the more I began to be hooked on alcohol and getting high. Soon I was going to parties every single night and waking up every single morning with pounding headaches and no recall of what had happened the night before. Instead of stopping, I kept going. Because of my foolish ways, I lost my job, my nice apartment, the relationship with my friends and family, and obtained for myself a lot of grief and heartaches. Soon, I had to drop out of school because I spent classroom times partying with friends. By the end of the summer, I was living in my car with nothing but a few bags of belongings and my guitars. At this point, I knew that something had to change. I knew that I had to get out of the hole I had dug for myself. However, I felt trapped in my addictions and felt hopeless and weak. I continued to live life with no signs of change. Then one night after a party gone wrong, I went out for a drive to clear my mind of what had occurred at the party. Deep inside, I could feel the emptiness that was slowly starting to consume me. My heart hurt and my soul felt like it was dying. Finally, I pulled my car over and cried out to God. I told him that if he was still there, to give a sign that I could have a second chance and that I wasn't a hopeless mess, and he did! In the darkness that had surrounded my spirit I heard God tell me that he loved me and he longed for me to come back home to him and to the ones I had tried for so long to push away. At first, I argued with God about how much of a failure I was. I told him I didn't deserve anything good and that I deserved to be dead.
However, God did not agree! It was in God's will that I come to Teen Challenge on October 14th, 2008. With the help of my parents and friends, I was able to come to Teen Challenge to get help in overcoming my struggles, and 'Boy', I have learned so much in the three months I have been here.
Since I have been at Teen Challenge, I have rededicated my life to God. I choose this time to walk in His ways and not in my ways. I want to live my life for God, because when I lived it for myself I found nothing. As I continue to learn to forgive myself for all of the things I have done, God is continuously encouraging me with his love and his word. I am slowly learning that even though I don't deserve this second chance, God says I am dearly loved by him and, because I have decided to live my life for him, I am not the person I was six months ago, but I am made new and whole in Christ.
I am so thankful that I serve such a gracious God! I know that without Him, I would still be in a world of hopelessness. With the second chance He has given me, I hope to help other women find the love that Christ has showered over me. I hope to lead many to His love and His forgiveness, because I am a living example of God's goodness. Indeed, I am loved and I am a new creation!"
"Therefore if anyone is in Christ he is a new creation; the old has gone and the new has come." 2 Corinthians 5:17